Oh, and I’m pretty sure this came to light when women were having a high rate of pelvic infections following surgery and someone(s) wondered what the hell was up with that. The thought of this makes me want to puke, and never go to the doctor again, and possibly become a vigilante.

In light of this, I think the tattoo is even more upsetting, because as many have pointed out it serves as a reminder that you really don’t know what the hell some creep did to you while you were unconscious.

Bleah, remind me to never need surgery…

Do let’s.

If everything was so above board, why not do that when nurses were around?

And why do it around her crotch area? If the idea was to “lift her spirits” why not the back of her hand, somewhere she could look at under almost any circumstances – rather than somewhere she can only see when she gets naked? Why does he want THAT to be the time she sees the reminder of him?

I consider his intentions and find them suspect. I’m on her side.

http://query.nytimes.com/gst/fullpage.html?res=9D06E2D7153CF934A15752C0A9669C8B63&sec=&spon=&pagewanted=all

I have a horrible fear of any surgery, and stories like these, plus my one experience, don’t help.

He was out of line and should be punished for his actions. Our bodies are ours alone not some etch-a-sketch for his amusement.

What makes you think that a commenter claiming to be an MD is in fact actualy an MD?

A number of commenters on the thread claim to be doctors who know the doctor in question and are highly protective of him in their responses. Certainly this is the Internet, and they could easily be lying. But there’s no particular reason to be certain they are, unless you think it’s terribly unlikely for doctors to be arrogant and obnoxious.

And if you do, I can refer you to a woman I know who’d had several children by a young age, entirely by choice. However, this apparently didn’t sit well with her ob-gyn, and immediately after having given birth to her youngest child, while she was still under the influence of anesthesia and somewhat incoherent, the ob-gyn pressured her, in tandem with her now ex-husband, to allow him to tie her tubes. That’s right, she was coerced into making a decision that would affect her fertility for the rest of her life on a snap basis while completely at the mercy of the person pressuring her to do so. She now totally regrets this, not least because she is remarried and will very likely be unable to have a child with her second husband.

Bodily manipulation of a non-medicinal nature was DEFINITELY a bad call by the doc; even if it has been pardoned by all of his previous patiets.

I would question whether it’s truly been pardoned, or whether many people have felt powerless to object. See the anecdote above — my friend completely hated what was done to her, but never attempted to seek redress because she simply didn’t want to deal with the fall-out. She doesn’t pardon what was done to her, she just doesn’t have the emotional wherewithal to demand justice for a number of reasons, not least because it would create discord with the extremely combative ex who was also involved.

But his intention has to be considered.

Actually, no it doesn’t. In the first place, the completely gratuitous sexualizing of the tattoo makes it seem very unlikely that his intention was good, as does the fact that he applied the tatoo when no one else was present. If everything was so above board, why not do that when nurses were around? However, even if we give him the benefit of every doubt, what has to be considered is the effect of what he did on the woman he did it to. If you can’t get how his having marked her with a reminder of her total powerlessness during a period she’ll never be able to recall, and his ability to have done whatever he pleased to her during that time, is extremely traumatic, you’re just not making any attempt really to put yourself in this woman’s shoes. Or, more accurately, her hospital gown.

But if Mateo goes for the juggular and tries to ruin this doctor’s life over something that can wash off, it would be damn near impossible for her to garner any sympathy/support from me.

You know, somehow I think she’ll manage to carry on.

what if she had had an allergic reaction of some sort, which may have even killed her? would that be ok because he was only trying to lift her spirts? it was unprofessional, unauthorized, a violation, and unethical.”

Two years later, my Mom’s doc did exploratory surgery on me. Turns out I had endometriosis. That last doc felt maybe I had waited “too late” to have babies and was sick from that (I was 22), but he was NICE to me, and so I chalked it up to a cultural difference. It felt that good to have someone treat me like a person.

Despite the one nice man, it took 2 decades for me to trust doctors again. I hope this woman sues and I hope she wins. This is egregious, it’s not new for doctor’s to treat women (especially those of us who are “classed” diferently from them) as their property while in their “possession.” It has to be stopped.

Good for her!